On October 10, 1897, Alice Ruth Moore in Brooklyn wrote to her fiancé Paul Laurence Dunbar in Washington, D. C., about public reaction to their engagement. They got engaged in February, but it didn't become known until autumn. Alice mentioned Victoria Earle Matthews (known as Dolores), the woman she lived with in Brooklyn.
Well our engagement seems to be pretty well known now. Everyone in New York has it, but it hasn't reached Brooklyn yet. These people are so slow. I was teased unmercifully at the sewing school Friday night, a half-dozen members offering to give me aid on my trousseau. I can't make a move unless I am teased. I told Dolores yesterday, and I told her that I was in earnest. She never believed me before, but I was so serious, she sighed and said she would begin to save up for a present.
Alice Ruth Moore to Paul Laurence Dunbar, October 10, 1897. Paul Laurence Dunbar Papers, Ohio History Connection (Microfilm edition, Roll 8).
Paul was also teased by friends in Washington when they learned about his engagement.
I am so proud of you my darling that I am anxious for everyone to know about our engagement. I have told the man from whom I expected to hear the meanest things, but he only exclaimed, "They say she's a sugah-lady, Jesus! But won't you two make a hot train -- Alice Ruth Moore and Paul Dunbar!" My friend Baker is astounded and delighted at the arrangement but he asks, "Where on earth did she get her taste?" I don't care, sweetheart, I believe that you love me and know that I love you with my very heart of hearts.
Paul Laurence Dunbar to Alice Ruth Moore, October 8, 1897. Paul Laurence Dunbar Papers, Ohio History Connection (Microfilm edition, Roll 5).
During the Christmas season, Alice visited her family and friends in West Medford, Massachusetts. She was able to show them her engagement ring, but not her fiancé.
I find it is generally understood here that we are engaged. I neither affirm nor deny. The ring is inspected and taken as proof positive. My bridesmaids have been picked already, according to gossip. How I wish you were here. So many folks expected you, thinking you would surely come. You would meet a warm welcome, dear.
Alice Ruth Moore to Paul Laurence Dunbar, December 27, 1897. Paul Laurence Dunbar Papers, Ohio History Connection (Microfilm edition, Roll 8).
I am besieged, overwhelmed with congratulations and love from my girlfriends. I don't say anything but laugh and show my ring. It is very much talked about here. You don't know how much I wish you were here. Your absence from Boston, I fear, helped to destroy some of my pleasure. Why didn't you come? Next time take my word and come, won't you?
Alice Ruth Moore to Paul Laurence Dunbar, December 29, 1897. Paul Laurence Dunbar Papers, Ohio History Connection (Microfilm edition, Roll 8).
So it is generally accepted there that we are engaged, is it? Well it's worse here. It's thrust down my throat at every turn I make. People hint and rhapsodize, joke or moralize about it. "What charming community of tastes," says one. "A regular Browning and Barrett affair," chirps another. Hang them! Why can't they mind their own business? Of course it's decidedly pleasant to be engaged to a beautiful and accomplished girl, and I know that I am a lucky dog and all that; but even granting this, one doesn't want to be nauseated with anticipations.
Paul Laurence Dunbar to Alice Ruth Moore, December 29, 1897. Paul Laurence Dunbar Papers, Ohio History Connection (Microfilm edition, Roll 5).